Monday, November 20, 2006

metro blues


the metro coach's floor is of a blue-grey colour. with little white and little black dots spread out on it. seven pair of footwear sit in front of me. and six beside me. two on my left, three on my right. i notice my own shoes. the same leather ones that took me to the hills. and came back well, as well. seem a bit old and wrinkled now. or perhaps i haven't polished them after coming back. hmmm. people wear an assortment of footwear these days. its not like the old times, when there were black leather formals & white sports shoes for gents and sandals/slippers of some variety for the ladies. a whole range of footwear options is on display here.

the floor has a thin layer of dirt & grime over it. its a layer, bearing distinct and varied marks, left over the day's span. metro coach floors are cleaner by any standard from other public transport in delhi. still, this many people coming and going, do leave marks over time.

perhaps, it might be a bit cleaner in the morning. i promise myself to take an early metro someday, just to verify this fact. i smile. and i smile at myself thinking this. its my old sarcastic smile.

been half an hour since i've looked up. since i looked up at anything. or anyone. i know there are people all around. chattering, blabberring, normally-happy-and-normally-unhappy-with-this-world-people. going on with their daily lives.

then there are all these feet. moving, shuffling, sitting lazily or standing firm. feet coming in, feet going out...bags, luggage...so much to see, to ponder upon, to avoid the gaze of this so called normal world.

half an hour ago, i left her standing on 'my' side of the metro platform. it was a morning well lived. campus, nirula's, kathi roll's, coffee's, chai's; walking, sitting, talking, listening; harry potter books for gudiya's b'day gift, and the coelho she took for herself; a whole world came to an end with a hug and a goodbye. its always difficult for us. so, a goodbye sans words.

she just stood there and smiled as i entered and found this seat in the metro coach. for the last half an hour, i've not looked up at all. something is welling-up from inside. and i don't want these others to see what is going through my mind.

and i'm so blue without her.

9 comments:

dwaipayan said...

I understand buddy, I understand...

nihar said...

aye hai,poor adi baby,missin someone. koi baat nahi, i understand,:)i understand,
we r on same boat adi;)

Revealed said...

Awww that is so sad. But you gotta bleed just to know you're alive :) n you gotta miss her just to know you're in love. So savour it :) :P
Its been a while since I came here and it doesn't look like you're writing much. Busy I suppose!

Anonymous said...

rang kisi ka aisa chadha ki baki sab rang bhool gaye.....hagrid ko bhi.....not wanting to be remembered

Vi said...

I took the trian home today; lost myself in my own thoughts as well; so much so that I almost missed my stop.

sophie said...

you carry her heart - you carry it
in your heart.

i just love reading your beautiful
posts of love:)

Anonymous said...

Oh Oh Adi, I am falling in love with your lovely posts about your love.

So much romantic they are... Have you read this ? What do you say about it? Not your kind of love though but still full of romance. :))

P.S.- Is Delhi metro that crowded? I thought of taking one next time when I am in Delhi.

Anonymous said...

hmmm. kabhi dekha hi nahi, kabhi jana hi nahi, gar tum gaye to kya hoga, ye waqt kahan, ye lafz kahan, tum bin ye jahan kahan hoga, har yaad k sath muskurate hue jab chera dikhta hai aansu me kahi, tum aa jate ho paas mere, gar na aaye to kya hoga...

meet_me said...

hey Adi,
I am more than mesmerized by your words! I am guessing she's so near you sp why u still are missing her... Think about people who've their loves miles apart... missing seems much a small word what say ????

And I must say, the comment above me, by "anonymous" is awesome!!!

dreamt before

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